About Myself Tara. 30-something spent her early 20's in a terrible marriage with a drug addict. Got out and pursued the single life with a vengeance. After tramping around and managing to never have a serious relationship for almost 6 years she came face to face with her reality, her long lost love. A year and a half later they were married. This is her story as she redefines herself as a wife, mother, business executive and tramp. The Players
Artwork
Random Linkage
Bloggers
the fifth column
Archives May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 December 2005 January 2006 Credits Given
Powered By: Blogger
|
Monday, January 23, 2006 I wishI wish I didn't feel so guilty for starting this site. For talking about something so precious, so full of love as my relationship. I am so lucky, so blessed to have a man that loves me so completely....I feel almost as if I am betraying a part of us by keeping it secret....That's the sugar side. The spice side wants to tell you about the amazing sex and how far we continue to grow.. I wonder which side will win? Tara @ || 9:25 PM || Monday, December 12, 2005 I Deserve A SpankingYes, it's been 3 months since my last post. I have to beg forgiveness again as my life has taken an unexpected turn. My job currently lays in the balance and all of my efforts over the past few months have gone towards saving it. Matthew and I have been doing fabulously well, with the exception of the past few days. Things have been strained and communication is way off. I'm sure we'll work our way out of it, I'm not worried about that. I hope to get back to this blogging thing soon. Until then my best to everyone! Tara @ || 6:20 PM || Thursday, September 15, 2005 My Apologies...How terrible of me to start a story and then leave it hanging....not that I have a huge audience but I think it was rude. I have been unbelieveable busy with work lately and just haven't had time to post. I think posting our story was a bigger task than I had first imagined. I am also such a stickler for details and was concerned I'd get something wrong....but that's not really a problem as long as the story is told. I'll get to it, I promise. Just give me some time. Tara @ || 1:38 PM || Friday, August 19, 2005 Not long after I arrived at the party I decided to step out on the front porch and have a cigarette (I've since quit). The front porch was rather isolated from the rest of the house.That was a difficult period for me, newlywed, just had a baby, my husband out cheating and dealing drugs...My husband at the time was both physically and emotionally abusive and constantly told me how ugly and unloveable I was. Looking back I realize it was his own insecurities and guilt that made him so terrible to me. I was lost in my own thoughts when suddenly Matthew appeared on the patio. How long he had been standing there I have no idea. I smiled and he smiled back. "Why haven't we met before?" he asked earnestly. Caught off guard by his beauty and his question I simply smiled and stammered an answer, "I've been around...." Our eyes locked and without saying a word we let each other know how attracted we were. He said, "I'm going to kiss you" and before I could say or do anything he leaned in and kissed me. It was the sweetest, shortest, most electrified kiss I had ever received in my almost 22 years. My knees locked as my legs swayed, his lips were full, soft, and kissable. Just as I became lost in the kiss reality hit me, I am a married woman and I pulled away. I looked at him as sternly as I could and said "You better not ever do THAT again!" He smiled and said, "it was good wasn't it?" I half smiled back, feigning anger, "that's besides the point! I'm married and you are dating a friend of mine! It's wrong on so many levels." I put my cigarette out and walked back in to enjoy the party. It wasn't easy, the heat and passion of our kiss together made me unaturally horny and guilty all at the same time. It also made me think of everything James had bene doing and how he could do it without suffering from so much guilt. I spent the rest of the party drinking, mingling and having a hell of a time trying not to look at Matthew. There were hallway meetings where he would keep his lips off me but his hands would travel to my waist as we passed in the crowded hallway or kitchen area. I was going to try and pretend that I hated it but in reality I loved the attention since I wasn't getting any at home and he was gorgeous. I started watching the way he and Jane interacted and it wasn't very boyfriend/girlfriend-ish. Then I felt even guiltier for trying to analize them. My best friend in the wold Jennifer, from High School was there too, in fact she had been the one to introduce me to Jane. She and I proceeded to get very drunk and very flirty with everyone. The night wound down and as we sobered up and said our goodbyes. Matthew and I caught one last lingering glance before I was out the door at 3 am. It had been a fun night full of flirtations, laughter, sexual innuendos that I am infamous for, and I went home happy. James didn't come home that night, but that wasn't too unusual. The next day everyone was going down to the beach, so the men could play basketball and we would, well, watch them. I picked up my infant son and all the other crap I needed and headed down to the beach. Tara @ || 8:50 AM || Tuesday, August 16, 2005 I hurt my back the other night riding my husband. I told people at work it was from the gym and they seem to believe me, especially given how often I visit the gym these days. It's strange that since my body has become stronger, leaner our sex has become more .....acrobatic for lack of a better word. Of course it's always been good, never a doubt there, but it is hitting a new intensity level.Could be that we are fast approaching the 1 year anniversary, of course we've been togtehr much longer than that. I've never told our story have I? It's a good one, full of hope and love and a little bit of drama...all ingredients for a good story. I've always wanted to tell it, but have been afraid that my memory isn't as sharp as it once was...then again it will only continue to dull so perhaps writing the story out here isn't such a terrible idea. I first met Matthew at an apartment he shared with Jane at a party they threw New Years Eve in 1990. Our first meeting was electric, filled with hidden glances, shy smiles and a stolen kiss. I had just given birth to my son 3 months prior and was married to James. Our marriage was a joke, the joke being on me since he hadn't been faithful since the day we met. I didn't realize it then, love can indeed be blind. We never went anywhere together and this special night was no exception. While he was out dealing and doing drugs, as well as whomever he was "seeing" on the side, I decided to get a sitter and get my ass to Jane's party. If James would have been there things may have been different. I walked in the door to find just a few people had arrived before me. I glanced in the family room to see some familiar faces and one unknown. I immediately thought, oh that must be Jane's boyfriend, and as that thought rattled around in my brain he stopped whatever he was doing and just stared at me. Our eyes locked a bit longer than they should have. I regained my composure and broke the stare and as I did so I heard him lean in to his friend and ask who I was. I said a quick hello, dropped whatever food and drink I had brought in the kitchen and then made my way into the family room. There were close to 11 people there already and everyone settled in with a drink in hand and started partying. Matthew and I kept stealing glances and.... Tara @ || 4:09 PM || Tuesday, August 09, 2005 Excellent weekend, once again. Filled with nothing spectacular but all kinds of lovey goodness. I wouldn't trade it for the world. Matthew had a lunch date with some of his guy friends on Friday, something he rarely does, but when he does he always comes back to me more appreciating than usual. I think he sees what they go through in single life and in unhappy marriages and it enforces our bond.He told me a story about a good looking woman that walked by and how they all noticed her. One of Matthew's friends asked him if he would try to "get that". Matthew smiled and said, "no way man, I'm good at home, my wife gives me everything I need and more." (I smiled at this, not knowing how much was embellishment for my benefit but not really caring either). To that his friends smiled and gave him a hard time. I smiled lovingly at him and said, "sure my girls and I check guys out when they walk by but if I ever said something about doing anything about it my girls would go into shock and could quite possibly kick my ass". Matthew laughed at that and said "it's a good thing we're so damned happy isn't it?" I stopped for a second and said, "I know we both just said that we check out the opposite sex (or for me both sexes) when with our friends..." I trailed off and paused for dramatic effect.. "Yes?" he answered. "But I've decided that's only ok for me" I smiled smugly in an attempt to keep from laughing. Matthew started laughing so hard he made me burst out into fits of giggles. "Ok honey" he said as he patted my head, "ok". Tara @ || 6:45 AM || Monday, August 01, 2005 NaughtyIt was hot, very fucking hot this weekend. Matthew and I had Sunday to ourselves by some freak of chance, both kids were occupied elsewhere. Rare indeed. We took advantage Saturday night, even though we returned home late from a bar-b-que somehow we managed to dig deep and get that second wind. I started by giving him a helluva blowjob and for once he let me finish.... I realized as we both lay there our breathing returning to a normal pace that we were both exhausted and maybe I shouldn't expect anything in return. I actually curled up and started dozing off before I was awakened by a gentle nudge... "Did you think you were finished?" He asked sexily. I smiled as I opened one eye and looked at him, "I wasn't sure." I replied in almost a purr of a voice. He rolled me over onto my back and proceeded to give me fantastic oral pleasure. My body was going into spazisms, my legs quaking, I lost all sense of who and where I was and actually started crawling back on the bed... When he finished he climbed on top of me, my body spent, a writhing mess on the bed, his dick was hard and he entered me easily. The new sensation of his hardness pulsating inside me sent me into orgasms almost immediately. It was a strange feeling, normally my hips are bucking up to meet his, taking all of him in. This time my body just lay there, accepting his dick, too weak to buck back, but the orgasm was just as intense. I asked him to get behind me and fuck me hard, which he did willingly. It was hard, and good and at that angle I did have the opportunity to buck up against him. He came so hard he almost laughed before he started, something he never does....he said it was so intense it caught him off-guard. We fell to the bed, sex funky and passed out. Sleeping in until 8:00 am was heaven and of course we started the whole process over in the morning, and again around noon. Then we were hungry so we headed out to our favorite mexican restaurant for some food and cadillac margaritas. For some reason the restuarant was unbelievably hot and we both started sweating profusely. Jokingly he grabbed an ice cube and tossed it at me; it fell down in between my breasts and we laughed as he tried again. He missed and I grabbed the ice cube and started rubbing it all over my chest and arms, which he found incredibly hot. He watched then as I rubbed it, discreetly, over my belly and dropped it under the waste band of my skirt. I looked at him and cocked my eyebrow "want to see more?" I asked as seductively as possible. He nodded, almost as if he was unable to speak. I grabbed an ice cube and made sure he knew exactly where I was sticking it. The sensation of the freezing ice in my very hot and sore pussy was fantastic. It made me gasp and I almost had a hard time catching my breath. I started squirming a bit in my seat and suddenly it was as if a rush or quick orgasm gripped my pussy. I lost almost all self control, my eyes rolled back in my head, and I must have resembled Sally's faked orgasm as I grabbed the side of the table. It was over as quickly as it started. I looked at Matthew across the table, when I was able to focus and he had a look of amazement on his face. He grabbed my foot under the table and put it between his legs so I could feel how hard he was. He smiled wickedly and told me what a naughty girl I was....we ate quickly and left before we caused any more scenes. We had to stop and run an errand at a local store and the whole time he was grabbing my ass, stopping to kiss me and grabbing at my tits, as he should I told him. We gave the security cameras a great show. On one aisle he actually lifted my skirt up from behind and started working his fingers under my panties, which were drenched.... That was all it took and suddenly we knew we had to get home before we mauled each other in public.... |
